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Hey Bestie: How can I spice up my solo sex life?

Updated: Mar 18

Hey Bestie: I’m happily single but I’m looking for a way to change up my solo sex life to keep it interesting. Have you got any advice on how I can go about this?



How fun is this question! As a solo, there are so many options available to you if you are interested in changing this up and simply keeping your sex life fun and interesting … and YES, it can be very fun and very interesting as a solo! Read on to get at least five ideas that you can start to take action on this weekend!


One of the most important aspects of your solo sex life will be being in touch with yourself. Nobody and let me repeat…nobody can bring you pleasure the way you truly want it like you can.


If you are like most of the world’s population you might not have taken the time to truly explore the things that excite you and bring you the most pleasure. This is a great opportunity to get adventurous and really explore what I call ‘the landscape of you’.


Once you are extremely clear on what you enjoy, you become so much more confident in being able to introduce your likes to others, when that time comes.


Next, let’s talk about edging – this is commonly known as getting yourself super close to orgasm and then backing off, then getting yourself super close to orgasm and backing off again and essentially repeating this pattern until orgasm becomes inevitable.


Word of caution with this one: your orgasm might be quite intense, and you may experience multiple orgasms as well ... you’re welcome!


Have you thought of playing with new textures? One of the easiest to access is something that we typically all have in our freezers…ice!


Grab a few ice cubes and gently rub them across your skin and parts of your erogenous zones. If ice isn’t your thing, you can try drips of hot wax. Two totally different sensations to explore (and there are so many many more as well). There are even toys that can be placed in the freezer for an added effect if you are interested in expanding your toy collection.


What about new positions and new places? Before you get too excited about this one, recognise there are some legal restrictions about what you are allowed to sexually do in public. Please be mindful of this. When I’m talking about positions and places – try new locations in your own home, from different locations, with new toys … the possibilities are endless.


As an added bonus to the five above, you could also try different types of erotica – like audio erotica or pornography. There are so many great options.


I could write a top 50 list, but you get the idea.


So you’ve just been gifted with seven options to try out: masturbation, edging, textures (ice, warm, etc..), positions, places, audio erotica and pornography. Now stop reading and start having fun with some of the ideas. Go for it, because after all, everyone deserves a great sex life.


Your bestie,

Amanda xx


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