top of page

Hey Bestie: What's the best way to ask someone to be a 'friend with benefits'?

Updated: Mar 18, 2024

Hey Bestie: What's the best way to ask someone to be a 'friend with benefits'? I just don't have the time for a proper relationship right now but I miss sex and I'm not keen on one night stands. I have a friend who I'd love to ask but I just don't know how to start the conversation. Also, do you have any advice about what the ground rules should be?


ree

So, what I am hearing is that sex is great and relationships take time and effort…correct! It also sounds like for whatever reasons, at the moment, the effort required for a relationship is just simply not available to you. Which, let me tell you, I’m really happy that you acknowledge rather than jump from relationship to relationship that you are not ready to invest in at the moment.


Before starting this conversation with your friend, you need to know whether or not there’s any mutual sexual interest – is the friend as interested in you, as you are them? Is the friend available? Would the friend be open to the concept of friends with benefits? Is this friend likely to get emotionally attached? (If so, you might want to find someone else, especially if you are attempting to stay away from relationships).


If you approach your friend without knowing the above and the friend does not feel the same way about you, you might land in an uncomfortable situation. When you are clear about your expectations for the casual nature of what you are looking for, you can then suggest casual sex with a friend, especially one that you’ve been flirting with.

Finally, I’m so glad that you asked about ‘ground rules’ because this is one of the most fundamental aspects of ‘friends with benefits’ that should be discussed that is often overlooked and what ultimately leads to this situation being less than successful.

Some of the ground rules should include whether the both of you are sticking to a single partner, or whether you can have multiple friends with benefits.


Discuss whether there are specific days/times, etc that are off limits, and discuss whether you are allowed to discuss the arrangements with other friends or whether this is meant to be a ‘on the hush’ kind of situation.

Please realise that this is not an exhaustive list and there’s plenty more in the realm of ground rules that could be discussed.

One of the best things that you can do is be clear with what you are looking for, and if you think your friend might feel the same, be honest while also being open to the fact that they might not be interested. Good luck!


After all, everyone deserves to have great sex.


Your bestie,

Amanda xx


109 Comments


Fazal Seo
Fazal Seo
2 days ago

1jj game Download is an online earning platform offering a wonderful opportunity to make real money from home. This new gaming app allows you to invest a small amount and play to make unlimited profit.

Like

anas raja
anas raja
3 days ago

For any international brand looking to enter the Pakistani market, my number one advice is to find a reliable seo agency in pakistan. They understand the local search intent and user behavior better than anyone.

Like

Janet Farmer
Janet Farmer
3 days ago

Some versions allow sign-in using you r youtube premium apk latest version 2025 model Google account via (a small service that helps third-party apps connect to Google). However, this adds an extra layer of setup and potential risk.

Like

Dorable yong
Dorable yong
5 days ago

We're here to assist you determine the best strategy for any project by dissecting the main distinctions. Essential subjects such as nec 4 contract, contract kinds, duties and responsibilities, crucial documentation, and efficient project and quality planning will all become apparent and comprehensive to you with UNICCMs. The moment to take control of your future and establish a solid foundation in construction project management is now, regardless of whether you're just starting out or hoping to further your career.


Like

Pkr999 app
Pkr999 app
7 days ago

With its referral feature, the PKR999 APK allows players to create passive income by inviting others.

Like

Follow me on social networks

  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • Facebook

Images of Amanda by Kat Wray of Red Eclectic

We acknowledge the custodians of this land, the Wadjuk people of the Nyoongar nation and their Elders past, present and future. Amanda Lambros Consulting acknowledges and respects their continuing culture and the contribution they make to the life of this city and this region.

© 2024, Amanda Lambros Consulting

935B Albany Hwy, East Victoria Park, WA  6100 Australia

PO Box 226, Victoria Park, WA 6979 Australia

Email: info@amandalambros.com

bottom of page