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Hey Bestie: How to try polyamory and keep your relationship healthy



How to try polyamory and keep your relationship healthy

My fiancé and I have decided to try polyamory for the next six months. How can we ensure our relationship remains strong and healthy as we start this new journey?


Navigating the transition to polyamory involves unique challenges and opportunities.


Many couples successfully maintain strong, healthy relationships while exploring polyamory.

The key lies in strong communication, clear boundaries, and ongoing reassurance.


Open and honest communication is the cornerstone of any successful polyamorous relationship.


It’s essential to discuss your feelings, expectations, fears, and boundaries thoroughly before opening up your relationship.


Each partner should feel heard and understood, with regular check-ins to address any evolving feelings or concerns.


Effective communication also includes discussing how you will communicate about your other relationships, what is acceptable to share, and respecting each other’s privacy with other partners.


No matter what, make sure that you both establish very clear boundaries before starting on this journey.


Boundaries are crucial in polyamorous relationships. These are not just about what is permitted sexually or romantically but also involve emotional boundaries, time management, and prioritisation.


Discuss and agree on what types of relationships are acceptable, how much time you will dedicate to other partners, and how you will prioritise your primary relationship.


It’s important that these boundaries are flexible enough to adapt as your relationships develop, but always established through mutual agreement without coercion.


Maintaining emotional security in your primary relationship while engaging in polyamory requires intentional and consistent effort.


This includes dedicating quality time to nurture your relationship, being attentive to your partner’s emotional needs, and providing reassurance of your commitment and love.


Polyamory, when approached with honesty, respect, and careful consideration, can enrich relationships.

It’s crucial to address any feelings of jealousy or insecurity early on by discussing them openly and empathetically. Validate each other’s feelings and work together to find solutions that reinforce security and trust.


Take the time to understand all aspects of polyamory so that you can manage its complexities.


Read books, join forums, and possibly attend workshops or seminars on polyamory. Learning from the experiences of others can provide valuable insights and strategies for managing multiple relationships. Knowledge can also demystify aspects of polyamory and help align your expectations with reality.


Navigating polyamory can be complex as well as mentally and emotionally challenging.


Working with a therapist, especially one experienced in non-monogamous relationships, can provide guidance, help mediate discussions, and offer strategies tailored to your specific situation.


A therapist can also help in addressing any underlying relationship issues that could be magnified by entering into polyamorous arrangements.


Choosing to engage in polyamory requires a strong foundation, excellent communication, clear boundaries, and a commitment to maintaining the health of the primary relationship.

Because after all, polyamory, when approached with honesty, respect, and careful consideration, can enrich relationships.


By working together and possibly with the help of a professional, couples can explore polyamory while keeping their relationship strong and healthy.


Your Bestie,

Amanda x



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