Do you feel a bit uneasy when it comes to going out on a date with someone for the first time? If you do, rest assured that many others feel the same way.
Luckily, there are proven strategies you can use to relieve the stress before you go out with someone on that dreaded first date!
Consider these suggestions before your next first date:
1. Be honest with yourself. Before you agree to the date, give yourself time to consider if you truly want to go. Sometimes, you might just be going on a date just because a friend or family member wants you to.
Use your own judgment when it comes to dating. Determine whether you want to go depending on what’s best for you at that particular time.
2. Plan ahead for the date. If you have a choice in the matter, think about where you want to go. What will you wear? A few days before, pick out the clothing and shoes you’ll wear on your date.
Is everything laundered and ironed? Are your shoes in good shape and shined? Do you need a haircut?
The more you do ahead of time, the less you have to be nervous about that day.
3. Be self-assured about your hygiene. When you have great personal hygiene, you feel better about yourself. Groomed and freshly washed hair, brushed teeth, and an invigorating shower can help you feel great about yourself and give you confidence on your first date.
You’ll feel more relaxed on your date if you know you’re looking good.
4. Before the date, think about conversation starters. You’re likely comfortable talking about yourself and so are others. Consider asking questions like, “What kind of work do you do?” “Where are you originally from?” and “How long have you lived in the area?” These types of questions usually help others relax and get them talking.
5. Know yourself. Be cognizant of your strong points and what you can offer in a relationship.
For example, use some positive self-talk and say something like, “I have a great sense of humor, know a lot about my community, and have an interesting job.”
6. Show genuine interest. Comment when you find something interesting about your date or ask them follow-up questions. Making eye contact and nodding as they speak shows that you’re striving to make a connection and want to learn more about them.
7. Consider interesting topics to discuss. For example, think about what’s happening in the community, such as new museums, parks, or restaurants that you could talk about. What’s been in the national news lately?
Think about anything interesting you’ve read lately or places you’ve visited. Great conversation fascinates others and draws them to you.
Avoid discussing politics or religion.
8. Smile. Smiling helps you feel more relaxed. Also, use your sense of humor to make others smile. Keep in mind that the other person may also be dealing with feelings of discomfort and anxiety about your first date. Therefore, a pleasant disposition and a smile will benefit both of you.
First dates can be relaxing, enlightening, and enjoyable once you get past the nerves. Apply these strategies the next time you go on a first date. If you approach dating with an open mind and good intentions, you’ll be surprised at how much fun you can have.